Hannah Boudreau
Hannah Boudreau
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look at us... out here doing the damn thing! love u forever hopey ๐Ÿ’ž#SPHS20
this sweet angel of a dog has filled my heart so much in the past week, it feels like itโ€™s exploding. โ™ฅ๏ธ
when I first brought Olive home, she was terrified to walk on linoleum floors, refused to sit with me on the sofa, and I had to hand feed her chicken broth and peanut butter just to get her to eat. one week later & Olive is eating all of her food (& making a serious dent in the bag of treats I bought her), getting tons of belly rubs, snuggling on the couch, & holding hands with anyone who will oblige. 
Iโ€™m just a proud #dogmom ๐Ÿพ (yes... Iโ€™m that person now!!)
wreath making & wine ๐ŸŽ„๐Ÿทโ™ฅ๏ธ
Today, Olive: went to the Christmas tree farm, got her first puppuccino at Starbucks, and got to go to the pet store to pick out doggy Christmas cookies. 
The holiday season: a wonderful excuse to spoil the heck out of your pet (and force them to wear adorable sweaters)!!!๐ŸŽ„๐Ÿถ โ™ฅ๏ธ
major sunday vibes ๐ŸŒฑ
๐Ÿ’› @metric
to be good // get better ๐Ÿ–ค
I thought long and hard about a clever caption for this photo, but itโ€™s hard to be anything but sappy when you have a friend this great. So thankful for you my twin! & love ya x1000 ๐Ÿค
Who needs chocolates on Valentineโ€™s Day when you can have an Olive? ๐Ÿ’•
day dreaming about feeling this kind of way ๐Ÿค
my best days are the days I spend laughing with you guys ๐Ÿค#beans #squintonceifitswindyAF
The transformation picture that is the most telling.... since the beginning of #EatingDisorderAwarenesWeek these paintings have weighed heavy on my heart.
I painted the first photo on one of the worst days. Anorexia took away all of my happy. Since then, Iโ€™ve had thousands of moments like it; dark, trying, grim. The second photo was painted on a day where I felt thankful for my body. Thankful for life. Thankful for recovery. But truth of the matter is, most days in recovery feels like the first photo. God, they feel so dark. 
I always thought recovery would feel like beautifully crafted oatmeal bowls and inspiring quotes on pastel backgrounds. Thatโ€™s what social media told me. But recovery feels like everything except that. It feels like stomach aches and dizzy spells. It feels like hospital beds and cold sweats in the middle of the night. It feels like crying at breakfast and lunch and dinner time. It feels like bruised arms from blood tests every day. It feels black and red and grey.
Yet it is all worth it for the fleeting moments that feel like the second photo. The moments where I laugh until my stomach hurts. The moments where I learn to play the guitar. The moments where my friends and I read our poems to each other. It feels like the first sip of a chai latte; it feels like seeing your dog after being away for weeks and weeks. It feels blue and pink and purple and everything in between. 
I recover because I dream of a life where the purple and blue outweigh the black and grey. And if youโ€™re feeling the darkness, please know itโ€™s worth fighting through. 
If youโ€™ve made it this far through this post, PLEASE hear me on this: there is a reason I chose to share this transformation photo. Eating disorders are not about whatโ€™s on the outside. Theyโ€™re not even really about losing weight or looking a certain way; theyโ€™re about deeply rooted internal beliefs about yourself that manifest physically. This is the best physical representation I could produce that explains what anorexia and recovery truly feel like.

#nedaweek #neda #mentalhealthawareness
authenticity ๐Ÿ—